I can’t hide this anymore..
The way you talk to him is a nightmare in my head. The way you two talk is as if I have never been a part of your life. Every smiley face, wink face, and country lyrics you send to each other feels as if it’s tearing my heart wide open… slowly.. And.. I feel like I should hate myself for letting them do that..but.. that’s just me.. I’m not like most guys.. most guys get a little jealous.. but me…. I take everything too personally, and you know that… But no, I’m not asking you to stop talking to him.. I don’t want you to do what will make me feel better… I don’t want you to because of me.. Even though it might help, I don’t want to be that controlling boyfriend that I’ve been terrified all of my life to become.. I did not write this to make you think about it.. I’m writing this because this has been bothering me so much that I felt like I HAD to vent to someone… something… And you know me… that takes a lot.. For the past week I’ve been getting no sleep… non..what-so-ever.. Every time I fell asleep I had the same nightmare about you two together… but now… I don’t even want to try to go to sleep anymore.. because every time I close my eyes.. I see that image… It’s like having that same nightmare every time I blink… So I decided not to go to sleep tonight, and write this instead.. I didn’t want to talk to you about this because I know what you would say.. and I understand.. Just please don’t be upset that I chose this method to explain this to you.. I wish you understood how I’ve been feeling..Hopefully, this might help a little… Sweet dreams, Baby gurl. I love you with all my heart.
The Love of Your Life
They should have LifeAlert for weed like for when you’re dry and your dealers aren’t answering their phones/aren’t around. You hit that red button and say “Help, I’m dry and I can’t pick up.” And boom someone rushes to your house with a fat bag just for you.